Hoovered by Narcissist? Now What?
Professor Sam Vaknin discusses the concept of “hoovering” in narcissism, which involves the narcissist’s attempt to re-idealize a former partner or to project the idealized image of the former partner onto a new one. This behavior is driven by the narcissist’s internal dynamics and the need to resolve dissonance and anxiety. The hoovering shared fantasy is unstable and lacks direction, leading to self-destructive and self-defeating behavior by the narcissist. Ultimately, the hoovering attempts are doomed to fail, making the narcissist’s life tragicomic.