Tip: click a paragraph to jump to the exact moment in the video. Narcissist’s Ventriloquist: Imaginary Friend or False Self?

1. 00:02 In my videos, I repeatedly suggest that the false self is a kind of imaginary friend of the child that goes that loses its fundamental essential primordial functions and become a demanding mollock, a godlike divine entity which devours the child, asks for continuous lifelong human sacrifices and is all brown, nasty, brutish, and not very short. Today we’re going to discuss the concept of imaginary friend based on recent literature and observations, the connections between imaginary friend and In my videos, I repeatedly suggest that the false self is a kind of imaginary friend of the child that goes that loses its fundamental essential primordial functions and become a demanding mollock, a godlike divine entity which devours the child, asks for continuous lifelong human sacrifices and is all brown, nasty, brutish, and not very short. Today we’re going to discuss the concept of imaginary friend based on recent literature and observations, the connections between imaginary friend and
2. 00:47 the false self. My name is Samakin. I’m your imaginary author of malignant self-love, narcissism revisited and a not imaginary professor of psychology. Okay, let’s start with the fact that the majority of children have imaginary friends. By some estimates, 65% of children. Imaginary friends are very common in early childhood. They are very normal feature of cognitive and emotional development. But the problem starts when the imaginary friend refuses to recede, refuses to to succumb and give its place the false self. My name is Samakin. I’m your imaginary author of malignant self-love, narcissism revisited and a not imaginary professor of psychology. Okay, let’s start with the fact that the majority of children have imaginary friends. By some estimates, 65% of children. Imaginary friends are very common in early childhood. They are very normal feature of cognitive and emotional development. But the problem starts when the imaginary friend refuses to recede, refuses to to succumb and give its place
3. 01:31 to more advanced constructs, internal psychological processes and a general maturity of the personality. The key challenge is to distinguish between typical imaginary friends, typical play logic behavior, play with his imaginary friends, typical interactions between very young children and their imaginary friends. Giving the imaginary friend a name kind of invented biography. uh attributing to the imaginary friends friend all kinds of powers including um divine powers, the creation of a proto primitive um individual religion. These to more advanced constructs, internal psychological processes and a general maturity of the personality. The key challenge is to distinguish between typical imaginary friends, typical play logic behavior, play with his imaginary friends, typical interactions between very young children and their imaginary friends. Giving the imaginary friend a name kind of invented biography. uh attributing to the imaginary friends friend all kinds of powers including um divine powers, the creation of a proto primitive um individual religion. These
4. 02:15 are all um quite normal. They are they are not even on the border between normal and abnormal. They’re pretty normal. But the imaginary friends sometimes becomes so entrenched, so all consuming, so all pervasive, so ominous that it signals the emergence of a psychopathology, some kind of perhaps emotional distress, adverse circumstances, neurodedevelopmental concerns or disorders. All of them impact the content of the imaginary frame, the behavior, attributable behavior of the imaginary friend, the are all um quite normal. They are they are not even on the border between normal and abnormal. They’re pretty normal. But the imaginary friends sometimes becomes so entrenched, so all consuming, so all pervasive, so ominous that it signals the emergence of a psychopathology, some kind of perhaps emotional distress, adverse circumstances, neurodedevelopmental concerns or disorders. All of them impact the content of the imaginary frame, the behavior, attributable behavior of the imaginary friend, the
5. 03:02 qualities and traits the child uh endows upon or bestows upon the imaginary friend and definitely the type of interaction. Critical to realize that an imaginary friend first and foremost is imaginary. It’s a narrative. It’s a p piece of fiction. It’s a fictional character. And it is created mentally. But while it is created mentally, it somehow assumes external qualities. It becomes a kind of external object. This confusion between internal object and external object, something that emerges from the qualities and traits the child uh endows upon or bestows upon the imaginary friend and definitely the type of interaction. Critical to realize that an imaginary friend first and foremost is imaginary. It’s a narrative. It’s a p piece of fiction. It’s a fictional character. And it is created mentally. But while it is created mentally, it somehow assumes external qualities. It becomes a kind of external object. This confusion between internal object and external object, something that emerges from the
6. 03:43 imagination, emanates from one’s mind as a figment and then acquires um its own life, its own existence out there. This confusion between internal and external is at the core of many mental health pathologies, for example, pathological narcissism. It’s also at the core of other forms of mental illness known as religions. Okay. So the child creates this character, fictional character and then begins to use it as a receptacle or a container for all kinds of data, information and stimuli. So the imagination, emanates from one’s mind as a figment and then acquires um its own life, its own existence out there. This confusion between internal and external is at the core of many mental health pathologies, for example, pathological narcissism. It’s also at the core of other forms of mental illness known as religions. Okay. So the child creates this character, fictional character and then begins to use it as a receptacle or a container for all kinds of data, information and stimuli. So the
7. 04:22 character acquires a name and then some kind of as I said um contours of a biography and the child begins to interact with the character as if the character were real. This kind of confusion between internal and external object survives into adulthood in narcissistic personalities and in psychotic people with psychosis in psychotic disorders. So children talk to these invisible imaginary friends. They have tea with them. They share secrets with them. They become best friends. They walk together character acquires a name and then some kind of as I said um contours of a biography and the child begins to interact with the character as if the character were real. This kind of confusion between internal and external object survives into adulthood in narcissistic personalities and in psychotic people with psychosis in psychotic disorders. So children talk to these invisible imaginary friends. They have tea with them. They share secrets with them. They become best friends. They walk together
8. 04:59 everywhere. And only child can see the imaginary friend. This is part of normal development. Nothing to worry about. It is also an integral element in the child’s emerging grandiosity. for the child to separate from mommy, to say goodbye to mother and then to uh explore the world, interact with peers, endure the pains and losses of reality. For the child to do all this at the tender age of 18 months or two years or three years, the child needs to be a bit grandiose, needs to feel a bit godlike everywhere. And only child can see the imaginary friend. This is part of normal development. Nothing to worry about. It is also an integral element in the child’s emerging grandiosity. for the child to separate from mommy, to say goodbye to mother and then to uh explore the world, interact with peers, endure the pains and losses of reality. For the child to do all this at the tender age of 18 months or two years or three years, the child needs to be a bit grandiose, needs to feel a bit godlike
9. 05:41 as if the child has some self-imp. And so the imaginary friend is a kind of projection of this grandiosity. It’s an extension of this grandiosity. And usually the imaginary friend has many qualities and traits and behaviors and cognitions and emotions which are either the opposite of the child’s or an extension of the child’s something the child would have liked to have. Similarly, when the false self is created by the child who is about to become a narcissist, the false self is everything the child is not. The child as if the child has some self-imp. And so the imaginary friend is a kind of projection of this grandiosity. It’s an extension of this grandiosity. And usually the imaginary friend has many qualities and traits and behaviors and cognitions and emotions which are either the opposite of the child’s or an extension of the child’s something the child would have liked to have. Similarly, when the false self is created by the child who is about to become a narcissist, the false self is everything the child is not. The child
10. 06:18 is helpless. The false self is omnipotent or powerful. The child cannot guess the cannot cannot decipher or decode the minds of adults which are abusive who are abusive and traumatizing or instrumentalizing or parentifying or overprotective and so on. The false self is all knowing is omniscient. The child is um assumes that something is wrong with with it. The child de adopts or internalizes a beta object. I’m unworthy. I’m unlovable. Something’s wrong with me. I’m the cause of my is helpless. The false self is omnipotent or powerful. The child cannot guess the cannot cannot decipher or decode the minds of adults which are abusive who are abusive and traumatizing or instrumentalizing or parentifying or overprotective and so on. The false self is all knowing is omniscient. The child is um assumes that something is wrong with with it. The child de adopts or internalizes a beta object. I’m unworthy. I’m unlovable. Something’s wrong with me. I’m the cause of my
11. 06:52 parents’ divorce. I’m guilty. I’m ashamed and so on. The false self is exactly the opposite. It’s a perfect being. It’s godlike. So the false self is is an imaginary friend in this sense because imaginary friends are exactly like this. It seems therefore that the child goes through a period most children go through a period of pathological narcissism. In effect, grandiosity coupled with a false self, an imaginary friend. So, how come how come we don’t end up all end up being stuck in parents’ divorce. I’m guilty. I’m ashamed and so on. The false self is exactly the opposite. It’s a perfect being. It’s godlike. So the false self is is an imaginary friend in this sense because imaginary friends are exactly like this. It seems therefore that the child goes through a period most children go through a period of pathological narcissism. In effect, grandiosity coupled with a false self, an imaginary friend. So, how come how come we don’t end up all end up being stuck in
12. 07:28 pathological narcissism la? Because we get rid of the imaginary friend and we no longer need these defenses. We no longer need to falsify reality. most of us and then this tiny minority about 1 to 2% who are uh effectively stuck in this developmental phase and cannot emerge or exit. And so with age and cognitive maturation, imaginary friends are no longer needed. And in this sense, they’re comparable to what is known as a transitional object. Okay. 65% of children have had an imaginary friend by age seven according pathological narcissism la? Because we get rid of the imaginary friend and we no longer need these defenses. We no longer need to falsify reality. most of us and then this tiny minority about 1 to 2% who are uh effectively stuck in this developmental phase and cannot emerge or exit. And so with age and cognitive maturation, imaginary friends are no longer needed. And in this sense, they’re comparable to what is known as a transitional object. Okay. 65% of children have had an imaginary friend by age seven according
13. 08:13 to studies by Marjgerie Taylor and Stephanie Carlson and many others. You can read a few of these studies in the academic journal developmental psychology. Among imaginary friends still active at age seven, 67% were invisible. 33% were personified objects such as a stuffed animal for example even a blanket and this stuffed animal had a distinct personality. So here we see a situation where a transitional object I mentioned a blanket. Yeah. A transitional object something the child uses to transition to studies by Marjgerie Taylor and Stephanie Carlson and many others. You can read a few of these studies in the academic journal developmental psychology. Among imaginary friends still active at age seven, 67% were invisible. 33% were personified objects such as a stuffed animal for example even a blanket and this stuffed animal had a distinct personality. So here we see a situation where a transitional object I mentioned a blanket. Yeah. A transitional object something the child uses to transition
14. 08:55 from self preoccupation what Freud called narcissistic libido to object libido to to preoccupation with others. So this transition from self to others um transitional objects such as a blanket, a teddy bear, they fulfill the role of others. They allow the child to move smoothly and seamlessly from one position to the next. An imaginary friend is a transitional object that has acquired a life of its own, has been animated by the child, endowed with a personality in a biography, and therefore continues to fulfill from self preoccupation what Freud called narcissistic libido to object libido to to preoccupation with others. So this transition from self to others um transitional objects such as a blanket, a teddy bear, they fulfill the role of others. They allow the child to move smoothly and seamlessly from one position to the next. An imaginary friend is a transitional object that has acquired a life of its own, has been animated by the child, endowed with a personality in a biography, and therefore continues to fulfill
15. 09:38 transi transitional functions in uh the fostering and the maturation of object relations. Let me put it in, let me translate this to English. The child uses the imaginary frame to exercise, to rehearse, to try out things, to experiment when it comes to relationships with other people. The child uses the imaginary friend as a standin for other people, a substitute for other people, and then continues to interact with the imaginary friend in a safe environment of the child’s own making and acquires transi transitional functions in uh the fostering and the maturation of object relations. Let me put it in, let me translate this to English. The child uses the imaginary frame to exercise, to rehearse, to try out things, to experiment when it comes to relationships with other people. The child uses the imaginary friend as a standin for other people, a substitute for other people, and then continues to interact with the imaginary friend in a safe environment of the child’s own making and acquires
16. 10:17 the skills needed, social skills needed to go out into the world and interact with other people. So imaginary friend is a foil, is a rehearsal space. It’s like the child learns how to interact with other people by interacting with this imaginary people. Imaginary friend. That’s great. That’s healthy. Studies show that having an imaginary friend is not only common, it it’s also normative is positively associated with better emotional understanding and an enhanced ability to take other people’s perspective. In the skills needed, social skills needed to go out into the world and interact with other people. So imaginary friend is a foil, is a rehearsal space. It’s like the child learns how to interact with other people by interacting with this imaginary people. Imaginary friend. That’s great. That’s healthy. Studies show that having an imaginary friend is not only common, it it’s also normative is positively associated with better emotional understanding and an enhanced ability to take other people’s perspective. In
17. 10:54 other words, the imaginary friend is a crucial element in the development of empathy. The child starts by empathizing with the imaginary friend. Something goes all right. Something goes wrong in the path from imaginary friend to false self. At some point the child makes a decision that now that it has an imaginary friend, it is not in need of any other people of anyone else. Like the imaginary friend is it. I don’t need anyone else. Why would I Why would I look for other people? The imaginary friend is other words, the imaginary friend is a crucial element in the development of empathy. The child starts by empathizing with the imaginary friend. Something goes all right. Something goes wrong in the path from imaginary friend to false self. At some point the child makes a decision that now that it has an imaginary friend, it is not in need of any other people of anyone else. Like the imaginary friend is it. I don’t need anyone else. Why would I Why would I look for other people? The imaginary friend is
18. 11:34 everything I ever ever wanted. Everything I ever wished. It’s a perfect match. It’s like going on a dating app and finding the perfect match. So why would I continue to be on a dating app? So the child gets married to the imaginary friend, so to speak, a monogous relationship. And the child gets disconnected, detached from the reality of object relations, the reality of other people. It is when the imaginary frame becomes a full-fledged substitute to object relations that we have the false self. One of the reasons everything I ever ever wanted. Everything I ever wished. It’s a perfect match. It’s like going on a dating app and finding the perfect match. So why would I continue to be on a dating app? So the child gets married to the imaginary friend, so to speak, a monogous relationship. And the child gets disconnected, detached from the reality of object relations, the reality of other people. It is when the imaginary frame becomes a full-fledged substitute to object relations that we have the false self. One of the reasons
19. 12:09 a child makes this bizarre choice is that the false self is perfect. It’s a perfect being. It’s infallible. It’s omniscient. It’s omnipotent. It’s beautiful. It’s it’s everything. And on the other hand, the alternatives, real people are hurtful. They’re painful. They’re imperfect. They’re sometimes stupid. They’re demanding. So why would anyone in his right mind not choose the false self over other people? Says the child. And this kind of child remains a child makes this bizarre choice is that the false self is perfect. It’s a perfect being. It’s infallible. It’s omniscient. It’s omnipotent. It’s beautiful. It’s it’s everything. And on the other hand, the alternatives, real people are hurtful. They’re painful. They’re imperfect. They’re sometimes stupid. They’re demanding. So why would anyone in his right mind not choose the false self over other people? Says the child. And this kind of child remains
20. 12:44 stuck. Why does this not happen universally? Why don’t all children remain stuck with an imaginary friend and disconnect from other people completely? Because not all children grow up in dysfunctional households with bad parenting. Now it’s important to understand that when I use the words abuse and trauma, it means any situation where the parents refuses to allow the child to evolve, to separate, to individuate, to have boundaries, any situation. A spoiling and pampering parent is equally abusive as an incestuous parent stuck. Why does this not happen universally? Why don’t all children remain stuck with an imaginary friend and disconnect from other people completely? Because not all children grow up in dysfunctional households with bad parenting. Now it’s important to understand that when I use the words abuse and trauma, it means any situation where the parents refuses to allow the child to evolve, to separate, to individuate, to have boundaries, any situation. A spoiling and pampering parent is equally abusive as an incestuous parent
21. 13:27 for example. So in all these situations where there is disqualified not good enough parenting to borrow a phrase from Winnott in all these situations the child would naturally gravitate towards the false self and make a preference prefer the false self to others. And so um Tanya Ruiz who is a psychoped specializing in learning and educational psychology and she’s also the therapeut therapeutic coordinator at uh and konigo a Spanish network of multiddisciplinary centers for children and so on so forth. for example. So in all these situations where there is disqualified not good enough parenting to borrow a phrase from Winnott in all these situations the child would naturally gravitate towards the false self and make a preference prefer the false self to others. And so um Tanya Ruiz who is a psychoped specializing in learning and educational psychology and she’s also the therapeut therapeutic coordinator at uh and konigo a Spanish network of multiddisciplinary centers for children and so on so forth.
22. 14:11 So she says, “Imaginary friends appear as a natural part of the development of symbolic play and imagination. They’re most frequent between ages 3 and seven, a period marked by intense creativity during which the distinction between fantasy and reality is still under construction. It is there that the narcissist remains stuck. It is th this is the reason the narcissist interacts with the world via fantasy. This is the reason why the false self takes over. This is the reason why the false self isolates the narcissistic So she says, “Imaginary friends appear as a natural part of the development of symbolic play and imagination. They’re most frequent between ages 3 and seven, a period marked by intense creativity during which the distinction between fantasy and reality is still under construction. It is there that the narcissist remains stuck. It is th this is the reason the narcissist interacts with the world via fantasy. This is the reason why the false self takes over. This is the reason why the false self isolates the narcissistic
23. 14:51 child later to become a narcissist. Isolates the child. This is the reason why the child gives up on reality testing, gives up on other people, object relations and and so on and so forth. Imaginary friends uh can take many forms. People, animals, animated objects, fantastical beings and so on so forth. Ru says beyond appearance, what matters is the function they serve. Some provide protection, others act as play companions and others embody aspects of the child such as bravery or strength. Through these child later to become a narcissist. Isolates the child. This is the reason why the child gives up on reality testing, gives up on other people, object relations and and so on and so forth. Imaginary friends uh can take many forms. People, animals, animated objects, fantastical beings and so on so forth. Ru says beyond appearance, what matters is the function they serve. Some provide protection, others act as play companions and others embody aspects of the child such as bravery or strength. Through these
24. 15:24 figures, children organize their inner world and rehearse the management of needs, desires, and conflicts. This could become a lifelong fixture, clinical feature because if the environment doesn’t offer a more enticing, more organized alternative, the child has no reason to let go of this adaptive solution, this positive adaptation. Emotionally, imaginary friends allow children to express forbidden forbidden um feelings like fear, anger, sadness. They allow children to kind of express desires such as desires which are unmet, figures, children organize their inner world and rehearse the management of needs, desires, and conflicts. This could become a lifelong fixture, clinical feature because if the environment doesn’t offer a more enticing, more organized alternative, the child has no reason to let go of this adaptive solution, this positive adaptation. Emotionally, imaginary friends allow children to express forbidden forbidden um feelings like fear, anger, sadness. They allow children to kind of express desires such as desires which are unmet,
25. 16:16 desires which are um prescribed or desires which are unrealistic and so on so forth. Children very often prefer to not communicate directly. Any child’s any child clinician would tell you that children are much better at expressing themselves via painting or drawing um symbolically rather than directly communicating. Children um therefore use imaginary friends as tools to make sense of their own emotions and to practice all kinds of coping strategies. This is the emotional side. But the imaginary desires which are um prescribed or desires which are unrealistic and so on so forth. Children very often prefer to not communicate directly. Any child’s any child clinician would tell you that children are much better at expressing themselves via painting or drawing um symbolically rather than directly communicating. Children um therefore use imaginary friends as tools to make sense of their own emotions and to practice all kinds of coping strategies. This is the emotional side. But the imaginary
26. 16:54 friend also caters to the cognitive side because these types of play stimulate language development, narrative skills, planning, cognitive flexibility and symbolic thinking. Also socially, the imaginary friend allows the child to exercise, to acquire and to enhance and improve inter interocial skills, the interpersonal skills. The child creates stories, dialogue scenarios and within these the child exercises executive function, problem solving abilities and uh social skills. So there is a very thin line sometimes friend also caters to the cognitive side because these types of play stimulate language development, narrative skills, planning, cognitive flexibility and symbolic thinking. Also socially, the imaginary friend allows the child to exercise, to acquire and to enhance and improve inter interocial skills, the interpersonal skills. The child creates stories, dialogue scenarios and within these the child exercises executive function, problem solving abilities and uh social skills. So there is a very thin line sometimes
27. 17:40 glacial and imperceptible between this healthy normal normative picture and pathological narcissism. The area the zone of clinical concern who says concern arises when play becomes rigid. The child does not tolerate questioning or modifying the imaginary friend. The content is persistently violent or aggressive. The presence of the friend causes distress, isolation or fear or when it coexists with other warning signs involving language, social interaction or behavior. So in all these desperate different situations, there is glacial and imperceptible between this healthy normal normative picture and pathological narcissism. The area the zone of clinical concern who says concern arises when play becomes rigid. The child does not tolerate questioning or modifying the imaginary friend. The content is persistently violent or aggressive. The presence of the friend causes distress, isolation or fear or when it coexists with other warning signs involving language, social interaction or behavior. So in all these desperate different situations, there is
28. 18:22 clinical concern. Of course, in the case of the narcissist or the narciss the child who is about to become a narcissist, the false self is rigid. The child doesn’t tolerate questioning or modifying the imaginary friend. The content is aggressive or counterdependent if you wish. And the presence of the but the presence of the friend causes a reduction in anxiety and a feeling of being protected. It’s a protector self state. And so it’s not distress, isolation or fear. It’s the exact opposite. clinical concern. Of course, in the case of the narcissist or the narciss the child who is about to become a narcissist, the false self is rigid. The child doesn’t tolerate questioning or modifying the imaginary friend. The content is aggressive or counterdependent if you wish. And the presence of the but the presence of the friend causes a reduction in anxiety and a feeling of being protected. It’s a protector self state. And so it’s not distress, isolation or fear. It’s the exact opposite.
29. 18:56 It’s actually a parental function or parental ambiencece. The false self is strongly parental. Initially, it’s maternal. It provides a secure base, but later on it acquires paternal traits as well. Finally, it becomes two parents. Two paternal parental be parental. So most children have imaginary friends and these imaginary friends emerge within certain developmental limits and then when you cross a boundary the developmental boundary they disappear and they get assimilated. Now there is room to argue It’s actually a parental function or parental ambiencece. The false self is strongly parental. Initially, it’s maternal. It provides a secure base, but later on it acquires paternal traits as well. Finally, it becomes two parents. Two paternal parental be parental. So most children have imaginary friends and these imaginary friends emerge within certain developmental limits and then when you cross a boundary the developmental boundary they disappear and they get assimilated. Now there is room to argue
30. 19:46 that in all future adult relationships we tend to superimpose the imaginary friend on other people. For example, intimate romantic partners, friends, best friends and so on. We tend to idealize them. An idealization is a form of rendering other people significant others imaginary friends. We are converting other people significant others into imaginary friends by idealizing them or um falling in love with them. infatuation and lirance may be an extension of imaginary friend uh dynamics. But imaginary friends which persist that in all future adult relationships we tend to superimpose the imaginary friend on other people. For example, intimate romantic partners, friends, best friends and so on. We tend to idealize them. An idealization is a form of rendering other people significant others imaginary friends. We are converting other people significant others into imaginary friends by idealizing them or um falling in love with them. infatuation and lirance may be an extension of imaginary friend uh dynamics. But imaginary friends which persist
31. 20:35 beyond a certain age usually we believe it’s age seven maybe nine. If imaginary friends persist beyond this age group then we have a problem and in majority of cases the problem is pathological bosses. These imaginary friends are associated with dysregulation, emotion dysregulation, um intense fear, anxiety, sleep problems and so on so forth which are very common in theology of pathological narcissism significant adverse childhood experiences or stressors or life changes I don’t know divorce beyond a certain age usually we believe it’s age seven maybe nine. If imaginary friends persist beyond this age group then we have a problem and in majority of cases the problem is pathological bosses. These imaginary friends are associated with dysregulation, emotion dysregulation, um intense fear, anxiety, sleep problems and so on so forth which are very common in theology of pathological narcissism significant adverse childhood experiences or stressors or life changes I don’t know divorce
32. 21:16 parental separation domestic violence or on the other hand parentifying the child, instrumentalizing the child or being overprotective and spoiling and pampering. All these actually stress the child believe it or not because in all these they are implicit expectations which the child feels that it cannot fulfill. So the child begins to develop what is known as an internalized bed object. Challenges with social interaction or language in neurodedevelopmental disorders also lead to the persistence parental separation domestic violence or on the other hand parentifying the child, instrumentalizing the child or being overprotective and spoiling and pampering. All these actually stress the child believe it or not because in all these they are implicit expectations which the child feels that it cannot fulfill. So the child begins to develop what is known as an internalized bed object. Challenges with social interaction or language in neurodedevelopmental disorders also lead to the persistence
33. 21:50 of an imaginary friend. And this is one of the reasons that current thinking begins to see a lot of similarities between autism spectrum disorder, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder and personality disorders such as narcissistic personality disorder. Behavioral problems. The child uses the imaginary friend to justify actions or to avoid responsibility. This this gives rise to aloplastic defenses. The fantasy becomes a self-justifying fantasy. A fantasy that exempts the child from responsibility and of an imaginary friend. And this is one of the reasons that current thinking begins to see a lot of similarities between autism spectrum disorder, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder and personality disorders such as narcissistic personality disorder. Behavioral problems. The child uses the imaginary friend to justify actions or to avoid responsibility. This this gives rise to aloplastic defenses. The fantasy becomes a self-justifying fantasy. A fantasy that exempts the child from responsibility and
34. 22:26 accountability. In these situations, the imaginary friend is not the cause of the difficulties, but a potential indicator that the child is somehow attempting to cope with internal dynamics or external experiences which are overwhelming, which are too much. I mentioned ADHD and autism spectrum disorder. In HD, in ADHD, imaginary friends are much more common than in non ADHD children. maybe up to 90% maybe more and imaginary friends in ADHD serve as a space for creative expression and internal play and they accountability. In these situations, the imaginary friend is not the cause of the difficulties, but a potential indicator that the child is somehow attempting to cope with internal dynamics or external experiences which are overwhelming, which are too much. I mentioned ADHD and autism spectrum disorder. In HD, in ADHD, imaginary friends are much more common than in non ADHD children. maybe up to 90% maybe more and imaginary friends in ADHD serve as a space for creative expression and internal play and they
35. 23:09 are not initially inherently uh worrisome like you don’t need to worry initially in ADHD so even though ADHD children are much more likely to come up with a fleshed out uh three-dimensional imaginary friend which is as real to them as as real people, there’s no need to worry initially. But in some cases when the imaginary friend encourages the ADHD child to be impulsive or when there’s a difficulty to distinguish imagined events from actually occurring events, events that actually happened. In other words, when are not initially inherently uh worrisome like you don’t need to worry initially in ADHD so even though ADHD children are much more likely to come up with a fleshed out uh three-dimensional imaginary friend which is as real to them as as real people, there’s no need to worry initially. But in some cases when the imaginary friend encourages the ADHD child to be impulsive or when there’s a difficulty to distinguish imagined events from actually occurring events, events that actually happened. In other words, when
36. 23:53 we’re beginning to see fantasy defenses that blur the line between external and internal, and when we’re beginning to see the legitimization of aggression and impulsivity, recklessness and defiance via the imaginary friend, then we have a problem. And it also may indicate a transition from ADHD to pathological narcissism and even psychopathy. These issues are typically addressed through interventions and so on. In autism spectrum disorder, the situation is a bit different. Many children with with autism we’re beginning to see fantasy defenses that blur the line between external and internal, and when we’re beginning to see the legitimization of aggression and impulsivity, recklessness and defiance via the imaginary friend, then we have a problem. And it also may indicate a transition from ADHD to pathological narcissism and even psychopathy. These issues are typically addressed through interventions and so on. In autism spectrum disorder, the situation is a bit different. Many children with with autism
37. 24:32 have difficulty to develop complex symbolic play. They make um everything concrete. They are not very good at symbolizing things. And this means that imaginary friends in autism spectrum disorders are less common than in the general population. When imaginary friend do make an appearance, it is important to determine whether the behavior reflects functional symbolic play or some restricted interest, rigid outlines, concrete thinking, literal thinking that the child transforms into some kind of constant presence. In other have difficulty to develop complex symbolic play. They make um everything concrete. They are not very good at symbolizing things. And this means that imaginary friends in autism spectrum disorders are less common than in the general population. When imaginary friend do make an appearance, it is important to determine whether the behavior reflects functional symbolic play or some restricted interest, rigid outlines, concrete thinking, literal thinking that the child transforms into some kind of constant presence. In other
38. 25:13 words, is the imaginary friend an internal construct that is projected or externalized or is is the child or does a child perceive it as real the separate existence. In all these cases, imaginary friends are never interpreted in isolation but within the context of the child’s overall developmental profile. Imaginary friend is a precarious terrain because it can become pathized. You you could it’s the child can transition from mental health normal development to a psychopathology via the mediation of the imaginary words, is the imaginary friend an internal construct that is projected or externalized or is is the child or does a child perceive it as real the separate existence. In all these cases, imaginary friends are never interpreted in isolation but within the context of the child’s overall developmental profile. Imaginary friend is a precarious terrain because it can become pathized. You you could it’s the child can transition from mental health normal development to a psychopathology via the mediation of the imaginary
39. 25:58 friend. So the imaginary friend as I said is a container or receptacle of the pathology. Need to observe it very carefully. And in pathological narcissism the imaginary friend is not only lifelong but it is the dummy that took over the ventriloquist. friend. So the imaginary friend as I said is a container or receptacle of the pathology. Need to observe it very carefully. And in pathological narcissism the imaginary friend is not only lifelong but it is the dummy that took over the ventriloquist.