Map Your Happiness, Past and Future Selves (EXCERPT)

Uploaded 6/16/2023, approx. 6 minute read

Summary

The professor teaches three techniques: talking to your past self from the perspective of an actualized dream, writing a letter to your future self, and creating a "map of happiness" by identifying preconditions for things that make you happy. The map helps narrow down the essential elements for happiness and suggests pursuing them for future planning. Additionally, the professor mentions writing columns for Brussels morning and hints at upcoming videos on repetition, compulsion, and fantasy.

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Okay, now I’ll teach you three techniques.

Number one, talk to your past self from the point of view of an actualized dream or fantasy.

In other words, put yourself in the shoes of your future self, you’ve realized your dream or you’ve actualized your fantasy and then you’re in the future, consequently, and talk to your past self from the point of view and from within the actualized dream, plan or fantasy or wish.

Say what you have to see, what you have to say to your past self and even more interestingly, see what your past self has to say to you.

That’s technique number one, go wild with this.

There are no rules.

Technique number two, write a letter to your future self.

Use guided imagery, try to imagine yourself in the future and write a letter to yourself in the future.

Then reread the letter as your past self, as your present self, although there’s no such thing as present self, but like your grounded self and read the letter as your future self.

You will be amazed at the different reactions.

Your past self, your present self and your future self will read the same text and will have totally different emotional reactions.

And finally, I’ll teach you a third technique.

It’s called map of happiness.

It’s a technique that I’ve developed. It’s proprietary and it’s part of Cold Therapy.

Treatment modality that I was unable to implement because of the pandemic. I was training mental health practitioners and the pandemic put a stop to it.

The map of happiness is a simple technique, but very powerful.

Write down all the things without which you cannot be happy.

Now listen well, pay attention.

I’m not asking you to write down the things which make you happy, but write down all the things without which you can never be happy.

So let me give you an example.

I like wine. Wine makes me happy, but I can be happy without wine.

If I’m told from now on you can’t drink wine anymore, I am still likely to be happy.

However, books, books make me happy.

But if I’m unable to read books, I will never be able to be happy.

So wine will not make it into the map of happiness.

I can be happy without wine. Books will make it into the map of happiness because I cannot be happy without books.

It’s a list of things you cannot be happy without.


Okay, now next stage.

Find the preconditions for these things.

Let me give you an example.

Traveling and shopping.

What’s the precondition for traveling and shopping?

Money.

If you don’t have money, you can’t travel. If you don’t have money, you can’t go shopping.

So money is the precondition for both.

So what you do, you eliminate traveling, you cross out traveling, you cross out shopping and you write money.

Another example.

Writing and composing music.

The common denominator, the precondition for both, creativity. Cross out writing, cross out making music, write down creativity.

Another example.

Being on your own, doing your own thing, you love it. That’s your preferred state. You’re happy only when you’re alone. And not having a job. Being a freelance.

What is the precondition for both?

Personal, personal freedom. Cross out being alone. Cross out not having a job or being a freelance and write personal freedom.

Go down and down, level after level.

Find out the common denominators, the preconditions.

Down and down and down.

For example, money and personal freedom.

You can cross out money because money gives you personal freedom.

And so until you narrow the list down to two or three common denominators, these are the preconditions for your happiness.

Pursue them.

When you plan for the future, you can safely ignore other things. Look to the map of happiness, to these isolated two or three elements and pursue them and never ever go against them.

Because if you go against them, you will never be happy.


Okay.

One last thing.

I’m now writing columns for Brussels morning in the description.

You will see a link to my author archive.

Those of you who are interested in politics, geopolitics, economics and finance.

Remember, this is the first of three videos.

This video that you’re watching is for laymen.

The next video is about repetition, compulsion, heavy stuff.

And the third video would be about fantasy.

And of course, I will try to introduce some modest, because modest is my middle name.

I try to introduce some modest personal contributions to these two concepts.

Thank you for listening.

And those of you who survived, it’s my permission to clink a glass of wine with moi.

Until this, sir.

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Summary Link:

https://vakninsummaries.com/ (Full summaries of Sam Vaknin’s videos)

http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com/mediakit.html (My work in psychology: Media Kit and Press Room)

Bonus Consultations with Sam Vaknin or Lidija Rangelovska (or both) http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com/ctcounsel.html

http://www.youtube.com/samvaknin (Narcissists, Psychopaths, Abuse)

http://www.youtube.com/vakninmusings (World in Conflict and Transition)

http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com (Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited)

http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com/cv.html (Biography and Resume)

Summary

The professor teaches three techniques: talking to your past self from the perspective of an actualized dream, writing a letter to your future self, and creating a "map of happiness" by identifying preconditions for things that make you happy. The map helps narrow down the essential elements for happiness and suggests pursuing them for future planning. Additionally, the professor mentions writing columns for Brussels morning and hints at upcoming videos on repetition, compulsion, and fantasy.

Tags

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